so they understand that they can replace most of their suitors with the next guy that comes along.Think of a girl in a bar, she blows guys off because guy after guy is coming up to her.
Once you have the active role in designing your life in all actuality, the girl is the overabundant commodity.
It is easy to blow her off since there are tons of women and having high qualifications for the women you welcome into your world makes a spot in it to be more valuable.
That is why the first thing in my mind when I am talking to a new girl is my only goal is to see what she is like to see if I would want her in my world.
As you get better at watching the women you are talking to and detecting how their feeling and such, you’ll be able to go much further. Things like good timing of when to [private]turn your back on her and engage you attention into something else for a bit. This is great when you detect sparks of attraction in her before they are explicit enough. Just in the moment when she feels emotionally stimulated or in need of validation, it is time to turn away slightly, causing her to lean in a little more. Attraction is just a tool to use. When she pulls you back, you can subtly reward her with a touch on the arm or showing in a subtle way that you are interested in her.. If you can tell her attraction for you has jumped, you can turn your back on her a moment. As you come back, if you go to kiss her, you will see she is more likely to accept the kiss.
“I never learn a thing when I talk about myself. Tell me a thing that makes your toes curl. What do you really desire more than anything. Tell me something that noone else knows about you. What’s the most unusual place you’ve hooked up with a guy? How about with a girl?!? If you were writing cosmo tonight, how would you describe your sexual fantasies?”
Like a cat, you need to keep attention and validation slightly out of the girl’s reach. If she finds everything, to be too easily acquired from you, she will get bored and quickly lose interest. On the other hand, if it feels completely unobtainable she will also lose interest and give up, go on to do something else. You keep these things, just barely out of her reach but continuously entice her in small increments.
Another way to begin the momentum of her curiosity is to pick something about her. Then say “You know what they say about women who….****.” (Whatever I can see about her). But I don’t tell her, I just look at her in a knowing way.
Like sometimes when I am talking to a girl and I pick something she has said with “YOU’ SUCH A Girl.” They’ll be asking what/why but I just smirk at them and turn my head away from them. It will emotionally frustrate them but in a good teasing way. That kind of playful emotional frustration that can lead them to chasing a guy they like.
“If I didn’t have to split now, I’d stay around & make out with you but I gotta go.” Usually gets a funny weird enough reaction. I have seen more than once a girl will use topics very detached from this to keep me hanging around a bit. Once I see this happening, I know I am in a sweet spot.
A girl’s emotional mind really wants to tame a wild guy. Someone who is unpredictable and surprising, who she has to work for, that she could lose at any moment.
When you hear those feeler ‘qualifying questions’ from a girl to you, mark it in your mind is a good sign. She is interested in you enough to want to know more and see more of what you’re like. She might say “So what do you do” as with all the questions, especially the qualifying ones, I use these as opportunities to joke or tease with her. You have her undivided attention; play with it a little bit like she is your little sister. If she asks me “So CJ, what do you do” I might tell her “I’m an ice sculptor. Last night I perfected the cube. You wait; with this tray I’ll be doing 12 next week.” Now I’m not saying you never tell her. I just put it off for the time being in the beginning. There will be an automatic stereotype of some sort attached to every profession there is. By deflecting for the time being avoids this and more indicates your likelihood for joking and being playful AND this also shows that earning her acceptance is not on your list. You know how cool you are, you have no need to give her your verbal resume. I do eventually tell her one of two ways. If she asks a second time in the conversation it shows she is really interested. I may tell her then jump to a story of what I wanted to be when I was a little kid, This is giving her the factual information she wants, still maintaining a better fun theme to what you guys are talking about.
The other thing I may say with many questions I am asked. “Don’t worry, we’ll get to that” sort of thinking. I make a mental bookmark in my head about something she inquired about. Then later after we have continued our current threads of conversation and topics have changed, maybe I bring it back up “You asked before about…”. By doing this, she will feel like she was better listened to. You came back to the point. Still, even at this point, I most likely will let her know what she wanted to know then segue it in a topic that is more fun anyway.[/private]
The reason I hardly use anything like that is because of the truth of the matter. Sure a woman’s good looks can catch my attention, but it takes much more than that for her to be able to hold it. [private]I have dated plenty of models, strippers and perfect 10s. But, if she is boring, psycho or another version of the crazy cat lady, I have better ways to spend my time. I may subtly indicate something about her has caught my attention, but clearly letting her know I want to know more.
Not only does this qualify the type of high quality woman I want in my life, a woman values what she has caught with the essence of her personality much more than what her good looks (thank her parents) will get her.
It is another part of generating her to be chasing you from the first moment. A woman isn’t about to chase a guy she thinks she has won over because she had some genetic perfection. She is going to work at getting and having the man that her conscious actions and behaviors have earned her. By this, she knows that she can continue her good behavior to keep him around even when she is sick in bed and can’t pretty-up for the day.[/private]
with her she may give you an insulting response or an angry stare. No matter what, stay strong. This is just another form of the chick’s test.
She may do this to see if you retreat, apologize and slot yourself into the category with all the other wusses she has met before you.
What will attract her the most is standing strong, with no surrender. It’s a joke for cripes sake, can’t she take those?
I may get confused at first since I thought she was bright and would get the joke. I am never apologetic or defensive about having upset her. Her mood will quickly change when she sees that I am not trying to offend anybody, I’m just teasing.
Since she will look insecure if she can’t take a joke, this tension will get her start to smile and laugh. That self confidence will spark the magic feelings of attraction.
There will be times when you are talking to a girl and there are issues that generate a deep rapport for you to share together. That can be good in all, but remember you just met this girl.
When it comes to people you have just met, a great way to connect is [private] establishing and maintaining more of a wide rapport,on many subjects. This is when you have many different subjects that you agree on. This is when you have many perspectives that you see eye to eye on. These are the types of people we end up meeting and feeling like we have known forever.
With all people many factors that started in our childhood never changed throughout our adulthood. We still do still operate on the award/punishment scales. Is she laughing at your jokes? It is time to reward her in some way. Show her you like this. Is she being offhandedly affectionate? There is another time to offhandedly reward her and indicate that you enjoy her.
When you first meet a girl, be it online or in person, as with much of the dynamic, you are going to have to use your first 90 seconds to be amazing, the ‘wow factor.’ Then and still she knows more about what you have to offer to the interaction, and about you as a person, you will have to take out 85 – 90% of the conversation space. (Remember girls hate silences, at first they are all uncomfortable).
As you to get to know each other then the scales seem to even out. My favorite place which you can discover as she tells you more about herself, is when she is taking up most of the talking time and you were just listening. I personally like to listen very much. I learned a lot about people in those places.
As I am listening I am making little notes in my head of topics to revisit and which ones she seems most passionate about that would be fun to talk about in more detail at a later time.
She starts out with such a small percentage because she is warming up to you and learning about your personality. Women are born social creatures. Much of this comes from learning about a person one is speaking with an identifying the points of rapport. She’s also learning which topics and styles seem to get her the most conversational reward as she shares her stories with you.
Guys who do not put this extra effort into a conversation with a girl they just met, I often see them letting it fizzle out and then walking away feeling like they were not liked. This definitely may not be the case and probably isn’t if you were trying to go 50/50 on the conversational talk time. Guys go on to think that a girl did not like them. This could be absolutely the opposite of the case, yet her natural womanly behaviors keep things this way until they are not, when she feels comfortable opening up more to you. I hate to hear guys are thinking that their opener was not clever enough.
The opener is nothing my friend. It is merely a spark to the fire of conversation, to get it going. It is the fire. It is what happens after that initial introduction that decides the connection between two people. (As a side note, I was recently talking to a check friend who made the point that our guy who would not be that hot in a photograph, once he gets her laughing he becomes pretty ‘smokin’.
It is what it is, but I hate to hear guys looking for that bonus prize, that ‘get me laid’ opening statement they can make to a woman. As with you, it takes something more than that which will just catch the attention, you need something that’ll hold her attention and build things up like never before. I hate to talk about these things like this so extreme, but once you’re in the essence of a moment those times will happen.
When it comes that first conversation I would suggest touching upon many different subjects. It is easy and very beneficial to keep changing the subject. You’ll see the ones that spark her up a bit. These you can amplify for a moment while noting in your head what they were. You can bring these to a high point then once you change the subject you can remember which topics to touch back upon.
By covering many different subjects throughout a first conversation you are feeling out which of the many topics you two can have rapport on and which subjects you can keep coming back to. Consistently changing topics rather than talking one to its dying day will keep you evidenced as the interesting guy you really are.
You really are. Think about it think about how many topics you do have interest in. Think about how many things really excite you. If you can briefly touch upon many of these it will do two wonderful things in an early conversation. It will show that you are a passionate guy because you keep talking about the numerous subjects you do get passionate about. Girls are very attracted to a passionate guy. Girls are very attracted to interesting guys with numerous subjects they have interest in.
Once your passion is revealed you will either see her shared passion in such therefore establishing a beginning rapport on the subject or she will just see yours. Even if she does not share the passion which you do she will admire your passion for it. Then once you have covered many topics and out of these found many that you BOTH share a passion about, you rapport is growing wide… across numerous topics. Here is how we find the type of people we can talk about anything with. I bet you can remember hearing of a girl talking about a guy she liked a lot. I bet that is exactly one thing she said about him (we could talk about anything.)
Now this is great, you can just keep talking and talking while switching and changing subjects. You just keep on talking making enough pauses to give her chances to respond. She may not, and you are not dependent on this but while doing this the second you see that something you are talking about happens to spark something in her you can clam up. Clam up so she has a chance to participate in this topic. Then you can help her to elaborate her points. You can ask for elaboration on details she mentions. While listening, it is nice to hold eye contact with a slight grin and nodding through her every word. This will tell her that you are paying good attention to her, intently listening and eager to hear her next passages. Doing this you can remain always ready to jump in and take over the conversation with points you heard and mentally bookmarked whenever needed.
As conversation is moving along you can cause new topics and ask for open-ended questions. I would suggest you commit to never asking any sort of ‘yes/no’ type of questions. With a little practice you can learn to make sure all of your questions are the open-ended type. The types that will inspire her to have long-winded answers are great. This whole time you can listen to her answer while mentally taking notes on details to ask her about.
Often girls will have to elaborate their answers to your creative questions. Other times girls may say something like: “Um… I don’t know.” This may happen because she really does not know an answer. Other times this may happen because she feels on the spot, she hasn’t gotten comfortable enough with you yet to open up and discuss things with you elaborately. Either way, you can clarify the question some.
This not only will give for a more detailed description of what you’re asking but also gives her a few moments to think about the answer to the first question you asked.
Sometimes girls need this. Whereas they might have felt to be put on the spot at first, while listening to you rephrase it they can be gathering an answer.
For example, to get to the core of our passions is often useful to look at our childhood. I may ask her something like: “Do you remember when you were a kid, what it was that you wanted to be when you grew up?”
Many times I find girls frequently do remember what this was. Maybe they love animals and wanted to be a veterinarian. Maybe they thought it would be cool if they were a nurse. If they tell me that they don’t remember I can give them an example of the type of answer I was looking for by giving them my own.
“Aw shucks (I say jokingly) that’s too bad. I find it can be pretty useful to figure out what we were thinking as kids to understand the core of our passions today. When I was in preschool, even before I could read, I still like to play as if I was reading books. The teacher’s aide told me I look like a lawyer so I was convinced her for some time that’s what I would be. I would go home and play mock trial with my parents either being a lawyer or being a judge. As I got older I never much wanted to be a lawyer but I do get a kick out of reading a lot and you find a strange fascination in the logic and reasoning that can be used in the courtroom.”
Nowas I gave my reply I gave very much into it. I was very sincere and told her about things I would play when I was a child. Sometimes by showing example, putting that ‘Umph’ into the reply will be modeling to her what you expected. Then she might be more likely to give you a more passionate answer and think some more about her own childhood.
As you are doing those things in qualifying her, once she passes the little tests you have presented it is time to seize the moment. “Oh my God, you are so cool. How can we make sure we hang out again? This is a lot of fun.”
You can even seize the moment and reward her right away. “That is so awesome!” And then pulled her close to you to kiss her on the cheek. There is never a reason to waste time. Once you detect that moment at hand it is time to seize it. Many guys a lawful themselves out of the park because of too many worry statements were second-guesses. Girls live on a moment to moment basis. When the moment is high and you guys are sharing one they love it to be seized. It feels natural. It feels like a natural connection in the moment of that connection was seized by you both.
Practice talking about racy subjects. Sexual topic should be an easy, free-flowing type of conversation that falls easily from your lips. This is showing that sex is an easy-going topic for you. This will also show that you are somewhat of a seductive person and have plenty of experience with women. They like that. It shows a skilled lover and a man who has been qualified by many girls previously. This will indicate to her that since you have been pre-qualified by many girls before her, she is less work to do. This actually is way more of a weighted qualification because girls never truly know how to properly qualify a guy. They keep trying in many different ways to cover obvious bases but there have been plenty of times before when they have done that and it not work out as they had expected.
“I am not the kind of guy that would just take a girl that caught his attention home the first night and give her a night of pleasure and continuous orgasms. I am not that easy. I see you have real potential to hold my attention but you can at least buy me a few drinks first.”
Another great way to turn up the thermostat for the heat of your interaction is simply to talk about kissing. Let’s say you been talking for five or 10 minutes and felt some genuine rapport developing between the two of you at some point when you are close in proximity during the conversation you can just ask her: “If I were to kiss you, on a scale of 1-10, how do you think I’d rate your kiss?”
At this point not only will she be trying to take pride at a presumed high score, she’s going to imagine kissing you. It will cross her mind at this point in the image is likely to pop in every so often since she started. At this time, I myself, since I was thinking about it as well, might start alternating my gaze from her eyes to her lips every so often. It might be nice to imagine what those lips taste like at this point. Because I do love the woman’s eyes sometimes I find it hypnotic to triangulate my gaze upon her. That is if you alternate from eye to other eye to her lips, this can feel very sensual just making the gaze that way. She will probably notice this too and feel sensuality from your gaze. I remember sometimes while doing this, girls have done either offhanded or explicit moves to get this happening.
Offhandedly they may just move close or get their face closer to yours. Explicitly, yet much less common and seen a girl come right in to kiss me on the lips. A few times when they had done this it seemed like they were distracted for a second as they came in for the kiss and then went on with talking as if they just had to satisfy a sudden craving distraction.
Sometimes hints may work better than anything else. Let her mind play with what you stated but then move on. There is no need to make your coy statements and then stop speaking because you’re waiting for her reaction. “I have a bottle of whipped cream in the fridge. You should come home with me and help me finish it off. The bouncer here reminds me of Jim Gaffigan.”
If you do make a statement and sort of positive her reaction, watch her carefully. If you see in her face and/or body that she isn’t heated up enough for this yet, you can take it away. “We should go back to my place and massage oil onto each other skin. I just picked up this kind that smells and tastes like mangoes.” (but if you do see her face showing anything but eager anticipation…) “No, wait a second. You are pretty tall I don’t think I have enough for your body.”
You see, before you took it away you illustrated a nice semi-sexual picture of imagery and her brain. Women love the imagination since theirs does paint magical pictures. Even if she had a bit of hesitancy to your suggestion, don’t worry, the picture will stay for a while and it will flash back every so often.
As you know, any ‘No’ she says is simply ‘No’. That’s easy. She wont even say it unless it is real But when it comes to subtle hesitations things are different, so I hate to see guys interpreting the worst out of these. If she did find a place to express her minor hesitation, like anything else, it is all a joke until it’s taken seriously. Laugh it off. Laugh heartily and then change the subject. Women are very funny like this when you don’t need to take their comments in a moment to be much at all. Many times she has many rejections. It is to satisfy her need not to look like the stereotypical ‘slut’. Most girls seem to have a need to establish themselves away from the stereotype. I think by laughing it off and not taking it seriously or personally rather, shows the insignificance you find in the stereotype anyways.
This also shows that you take any rejection towards you as kind of a joke. Since girls usually fall into your arms and you understand she is saying what needs to be said to establish herself as a non-slut, all you can do is laugh it off. You heard it, you accept it, you allow her to establish what she needs to (as not having behaviors that would classify her as a ‘slut) but still not taking it too seriously or personally.
Most of the time, I find that girls need to get their protest to be ‘on the record’. Once this is said they feel a little freer to give in to their desires and go with their attraction. I see most often that girls do not want you to stop your pursuit based on this ‘technical rejection’. Now things can go along as you both want. This is why are found laughing it off to be the easiest acceptance of it. You accept the fact she wants her minor protest to be heard but nothing more since it wasn’t an outright ‘No’..
You don’t need to have a smooth transition into some of these things. It may take some practice but often being very comfortable in a major change in tempo of the conversation you’re having can be quite charming to a girl. This can show you have major balls, which is nice.If you have the comfort to adjust the tempo of a conversation from casual then easily slipping in a sexual innuendo shows you are very confident and comfortable with your sexuality. This is very attractive.
21st century has been seen to stifle many people’s free expression of the sexuality inside of them. You don’t have to be a part of that. Being very bold when you first approached her and then bolt throw your interaction shows you are not ‘just another average guy’. Keeping the tension up, and keeping her slightly intimidated is a sweet spot for you both. When you can introduce these dramatic tempo changes to the conversation it goes to reveal that you are person who you never know what to expect from him.
After laying out somewhat of a foundation of that, let me cover a part of the ‘rejection’ topic. There really is no such thing until the woman says “No” or something of that specific nature. This is another reason why I personally prefer open-ended questions and sometimes indicating my desired intents with a statement rather than a question. When you start getting into racy topics (and other topics actually) you will see that any lack of explicit rejection is actually acceptance.
In the case of yes/no questions think of it this way, if you were to say something like: “Do you want to…” and she feels she needs to say “no” to maintain her image as proper and that is what she’ll do. This being said, if you were to say something like: “Let’s go do this…” and she has no reply than she is for the suggestion. If she is specifically and directly not for the suggestion she will go ahead and say something along the lines of indicating that she doesn’t want to or she can’t or it’s not possible for some reason.
Remember that in many cases any lack of negation to your suggestion is a girl’s way of accepting it. To make a suggestion without it being a yes/no question, you can say something like “We should go to my house to smoke hookah and get my cat to chase the laser pointer.” Or something like “We should go back to my place and watch my cat do back flips while you give me a massage.” If she says nothing then your suggestion has generally been accepted. You don’t have to consider her ‘not into it’ unless she says something like “No, that’s not a good idea” or another thing along those lines. The only other time I can think of she may indicate she is not into it if she is not his while you’re on the way were about to leave to then she may indicate it then. Otherwise she is all for it. As a standard, girls don’t normally say something like “Yeah let’s go do that.” They will go along with what they think may be fun until they don’t.
While you are having a great time enjoying each other’s company, you should just presume, as you would with any other friend that she is coming home with you. Don’t go in at all of these unspoken and unfounded expectations of negation where they’re not necessary. Do not make an issue of a non-issue.
Making these random comments with sexual undertones is a part of what I explained as foreplay and my detailed passages about sexy-time. Foreplay should not begin when you decide to get sexually intimate, as an ‘all of a sudden’ event. You should consistently be flirting and sprinkling in seductive comments throughout your conversation with a girl you have a sexual interest in. A girl’s imagination is a beautiful thing.
When our thoughts are brought to sexy places it can start her arousal and maintain it at mild levels way before any touching happens. Doing this consistently and steadily along with a slow teasing physical foreplay can bring the woman to unknown heights in their orgasm.
Girls do want a bold confident man. While many guys try to sneak their way in to an interaction with a girl with crafty, clever lines… if you just go in with your boldness this will make quite an impression in itself.
You can begin your flirting and sensuality and spoken foreplay from the very minute you say hi to a new girl. It is subtle yet this is revealing all your cards on the table in a way. Girls have been hit on since they hit puberty. There is no way for any guy to approach her with intensity in his mind and are not able to see through it. It is much easier if you just cut all of the bullshit. When I approach a girl it is no secret that she caught my attention. I am now talking with her to see what she is like, to see if she can hold my attention, to see if I want more of my time to be spent with this girl. When a guy comes up to a girl unafraid of any ‘risk of rejection’ or what have you, then all of a sudden she sees a shinier apple presented to her.
I have found it to be perfectly fine and very well accepted to have my intentions obvious. It seems like some guys are trying to sneak their way into a girl’s attention and coerce her to the bedroom without her realizing what’s going on. This does not happen, this is not seduction. Recently while at a mall with a friend of mine we decided to go into Spencer gifts. As you’re walking and my friend was telling me that the store now had quite an extensive sex toy selection.
While walking in I saw it was a cute girl was working the register that day so my first sentence to her was: “My friend tells me that this is a sex toy shop nowadays. Is that true?” With this little piece of information I was able to start our conversation on a somewhat sexual level. When she tells me the story is as I suspected I ask her to show me her collection. As we get over to the section of the store I tell her that I was curious about vibrators. I then asked her to tell me which is the best or which is the most popular. She goes on to show me the first model that she thought of. I will not ask her questions of the reasons it was supposedly better than the rest. While she was explaining its features I simply gazed upon her. I looked into her eyes, enjoyed gazing upon her face and neck and listening to the sexual topic she was describing and the sensual way she was describing it.
As she was explaining the features of this first vibrator I went on to ask her:”Does the nice sounding features of this vibrator cause a woman to lose the novelty, enjoyment of the real thing, of a real penis?” With utter sincerity, she went on to tell me with a very sophisticated sounding know-how that this absolutely was not true. “From my perspective, and understanding both, although this is very nice there is nothing like a real penis. There is nothing like skin on skin.” She was getting very sexy and describing this and seemed to want to prolong the conversation so she went and picked up a second model and describe its features. I merely listened and enjoyed the sensuality I was watching come into her as she described the sexual nature of these devices.
A girl enjoys a bold and confident man who has no qualms about touching upon the subjects because then again, by doing this you show her that the subjects are absolutely acceptable in conversations between the two of you. She will know now that she can freely express how she feels about such topics. Forget any ‘risk’ of possible rejection you are thinking. I think you should embrace and dance with these risky topics to get yourself comfortable with them and indicate to her that you are comfortable with her talking of them. Women love sex more than we men do. Once she feels she has established herself past the anti-slut protocol, and these topics have a perfect comfort ability as when shared with you, she will feel like she can enjoy you and her own sexual experience without being (looked down upon.)
I hear and see many guys who think that the minor rejections are something they earned. In essence that is really not the case. You see, women have these built-in automatic rejections to hand out to the general male crowd. Girls want to ensure they have high standards for which man they get with. If they can toss out a simple easy rejection to their approach and he drops the issue, then that was easy. She now filtered through and eliminated a weak sort of man. Girls have the negation to incoming males built-in is an automatic. They have been pursued and approached by men since puberty. Guys have whistled at them from driving by, guys have ‘Cat-Called’ them from the construction site and guys have ogled them on the beach since they grew boobies.
Get over the pride. Hearing these minor statements of rejection is really nothing. If you are subtly and not so subtly indicating your intent, you will see a few things. She will begin thinking about and imagining what sexy-time with you is like. She will see you are bold and candid and comfortable enough to be taking things all the way. And finally, somewhat based on her reaction, you’ll be able to see how much attraction has been built so you can gauge and decide your current actions with this girl and/or future actions with future prospects.
I told you that women are very much on the moment to moment basis and testing you. Personally I think of up several times I’ve stated a firm opinion on one side of the subject. The girl I was speaking with that expressed the opposite side of the same subject. I quickly acknowledged (not discrediting her point) but then went on to further illustrate the reasons why I feel the way I do. I’ve seen more than one case where a girls next comments will be those on the side of the issue that I originally expressed. seems they just throw these things out there to see the resiliance of a potential male in their world.
Life is funny, enjoy it. It is all a joke until it’s taken seriously and only take the part seriously which you wish to be a part of your world. What points a girl makes that you do take seriously is another reward in conversation that will inspire them to grow. Reward the ones that you like to have as a part of your world.
Since the best punishment from childhood on is merely ignoring, ignore all of those that you disagree with. You are merely paying attention to the ones you like therefore showing there a reason to elaborate those points. If she is getting no attention or acknowledgment about the points you don’t like she is very much less likely to elaborate on those. On the ping-pong table she got no pong to her ping.
….you can easily change her mood, not her mind. Stay non-reactive no matter if you are getting results that differ from what you wanted. Being non-reactive is very attractive. Make sure you are having fun.
If you aren’t having fun, she wont have fun. Girls like to follow the lead and a fun lead is better than anything else.
An easy way to start the momentum in a subtle way of her chasing you, and [private] chasing your approval of her. this is another key to keeping the sexual tension built. Once you have found some interesting points the two of you have rapport on say something like:
“You seem interesting to me, I might want to get to know you better & see how things go.”
She hasn’t won a place in your life yet. She is still on a moment to moment basis, depending on how well she does. You don’t just let any girl in your life, you have certain qualifications and she has to has to earn her place with you. [/private]
A man that walks tall and handles every situation with ease shows her a major protection when it comes to the rest of the world.
Girls are never quite sure how to properly qualify a man. They have been trying to get their process down since they started dating but after a few mistakes or men that didn’t turn out how they expected continues to refine their qualification process. If a woman sees a man who’s company is valued by other women, she assumes that he has already been pre-qualified on the qualities the women agree on.
When a woman meets a man that she cannot easily have completely simply based on her good looks as the bait, she works for what she can almost have & then appreciates and values her catch much more.
I say: “Actually I was just [private] being social. But honey, accusing a stud like myself of hitting on you is not a good way to get me to like you more. Try being yourself,I like that. But don’t expect to get in my pants, I am more than piece of meat for you to enjoy ” [/private]
It works best to generate attraction till you see an even keel of mutual attraction is going on. Stay away from the ‘What do you do?’, ‘Where are you from?’ even the ‘What is your name?’ type of interview questions until a healthy dose of attraction is built up.
Don’t start until you see her showing ways that she is interested in you first. Keep everything a playful vibe; these are all practice people until you see something more. Once you see her signals that she is interested, and then it is okay to be showing her that your interest is of the same level. Regardless of what you feel inside, you should be showing her and equal amount of interest to reward her signals, but nothing more yet.
If she feels like she has won your heart before you guys had a chance to get to know each other, she will think: ‘Game Over’ and move on to the next guy.
As soon as I see her touching me, laughing at my jokes (even the stupid ones) and she is staying around for like 20 minutes or so, then I know there is a sweet spot going on. It’s not till then I start asking her some screening questions: “So what do you do for fun?”
Every time she tells me things about herself that I like, that I am attracted to, I compliment her on those points. This shows her which topics and behaviors get the most reward. She will be increasing these which will ensure a better time for us both.
At this point of learning more about her, I will say: “When I first met you, I wasn’t so sure about you…but now that I get to know you you are pretty interesting. This is usually the point when I begin to increase my playful touching to further reward the amount I like her.
This may start with tapping and poking to high-fives, pushing, butt-bumping and thumb wrestling. After the playful stuff, I may move on to hugging, holding hands like I am mocking a couple, cheek kissing, and picking her up jokingly.[/private]
You are still that incredibly fun, interesting guy that she met. You have so many women that she has no idea if you are going to ask her out at all. You are totally un-needy. She wants you to tell her when and where to meet you. You don’t ask; you direct, since you are a leader.
Mainly, you want to reinforce in her mind…[private]
… that you are still that super fun guy she met, continue building lots of comfort (while keeping
the attraction fires burning), and last, but not least, get her to meet up with you.
The secret to good phone game is to be completely and totally un-needy. In any attractive woman’s life, there have been a million guys who she has her number to and lived to regret it; primarily because they made it a point to constantly ask her out at the slightest opportunity, whenever they had her on the phone. You are not going to be that guy. You are going to be that ultra-cool guy she wants to go out with but doesn’t give her any certainty that you will ever ask her out at all.
When you mention fun things you have in your upcoming plans, as soon as you hear her interest in them, it is so easy to suggest “Totally. I think we have room. You should definitely come along.”
“Our house almost got broken into when I was eight…but my if dad installed some swinging paint cans and some micro machines by the stairs that shit woulda never happened.”
You can treat it as a joke or that you know she must be joking to be worrying about such trivial matters. To achieve the joke, the idea is to build suspense, then mix the serious with the ridiculous.
For example, on a first date she asks: “How long has been since you been on a date?”[private]
Hearing this, I pause & look very serious. “Well, does my mom count? …because she escorted me to the Halloween ball in the third grade.” [/private]
Talk to her for a few minutes then walk away and do something else (this is key when [private] you see she is at a high point because of your interaction.
This keeps her wanting more. You can make her want what you have, what you are. Give her a little and then tease her a bit.
Do not make anything easy to get. Stay mysterious.
There is no need to answer questions about work so early. Be vague, especially if you have a really good answer. The most confident people never need to brag. Never give a woman a direct answer.
Play with her a little bit. Answer questions with questions. Get her to commit to something. If she complains or doesn’t like something, turn it up and give it back the way you would to our little sister.
Never give a woman exactly what she asks for. Always send mixed signals. Tell her “let’s be friends” at random times to show her she is in danger of getting stuck in your ‘friend-zone’ and nothing else.
Be unpredictable. Keep mixing it up and changing the patterns. Be distinctive, not boring. As far as showing your interest, take two steps forward then one step back. That would be two steps that indicate your interest to her, with a separate single one to indicate you’re not interested.
Keep up the tension. Like playing poker, always raise & call her bluff. You can lead and move forward very confidently. There is no need to apologize, act apologetic or insecure. Don not try to get any approval or look like you are trying to impress people, especially girls. Softies are for the dryer[/private]
In essence I tell Mya that I don’t want to fuck a girl based on appearance, I want to fuck a girl based on what I find inside.
I can look at beautiful woman, but beauty is common. I have dated too many tens/models/strippers than I’d like to admit… but for me to want any sexy-time out of a situation, I need a girl who can entertain my insides.
Since beauty is too common, there are three things I look for. A good personality, a good energy, and a good outlook.”
I look her down then up to her eyes: “You got two out of three, its a good start.”
Then she wants to know which ones she has & which one she is missing. Things turn into a playful cat & mouse as I change the subject.
There is no reason to show off. The most successful people with the greatest achievements talk about them like they are very insignificant.
I have heard different guys’ response to a girl’s questions of “What do you do?” go into a very dramatic long, detailed answer where he thinks he is being subtle about how cool he is, or how prestigious his job is, or how smart he is to have gotten there or how wealthy he is because he did.
This looks very insecure and women are masters at seeing through this type of thing.
Usually with a qualifying type question like that, I am [private]flattered that she is interested enough at this point to want to know more but I still give her a teasing/joking (Obviously BS) answer and spin it back to her, have her qualifying herself to me. “Ya, I have finished school for it and now I am working by scraping the gum off the bottom of seats at movie theaters. Very demanding nowadays…What do you do?”
Or I may tell her “I jump out of cakes at birthday parties.” Or “I am a disposable lighter repairman. 4 years of schooling finally paid off. “
Usually the girl laughs or chuckles to my joke, then goes on to tell me seriously about her career paths. Now this has the momentum generated of her qualifying herself to me, working to win my approval.
When I do get to what I do for work, rather than tell her what it is, I explain to her all the reasons I love what I do. I’ll talk about how I got into it, and how it fulfills me very much. “When I was a kid my dad told me to think of something that I would do all day/every day for nothing. Once I could earn a living doing that, I am successful. At this point, I am as close to that as I can imagine, and the direction I am in, what I have planned gets even better.”
Even as she asks me for details I stay very vague at this point. I spend the time talking about the fulfillment it gives me to help people to their successes, or examples of why I love what I do.
Today when you go out, I want your energy to be spilling into everything that you do.
We know that high energy people are very attractive and lack of energy ones seem to be often avoided. We see low energy people and feel they would be sucking energy from us but high energy people will fill us with [private]that juice of life!
Project your burst of energy by maximizing your smile to each person you greet & each person who hold your eye contact through a whole second. Like every muscle, the smile is something to exercise into place and you will find it actually makes you feel happier while working this set of muscles out to their fitness. Also people you pass each day will be returning your smiles which adds to this inner-bliss.
Like the smile muscles, workout your laugh muscles. You can laugh and laugh loud and laugh frequently. Keep pushing it. If you hear something a little funny, laugh a little more than you would normally. This becomes an easy habit. When there is nothing to laugh about, you may be laughing about a joke you heard yesterday or an interesting ironic observation you made about where you are that you haven’t shared yet. To be hearing your belly laughter, people will become very curious and you don’t have to explain to them unless you want to.
When they do ask, tell them that you will tell them in a few and talk about something else. Tell them you can’t talk about it yet. Tell them that you will tell them later.
These are comments you have that will also keep people curious about you, keep working these muscles out!
Talk about all the happy events in your life in in the world around you. Talk with excitement and enthusiasm. I can talk with such passion and excitement about a simple meal I had or exclaim very surprised disbelief that I didn’t know a trivia fact my friend recently shared with me.
Expressing this contagious energy and passion about even the little things in your life makes your life very charming, very desirable to know more about and maybe become a part of. Women are very susceptible to the contagious emotions.
Take her along in your enthusiasm and it will be a fun shared place to be together. Help her to unlock her own passion some more by getting very excited about her topics. She will start to associate you with this passion in a very favorable and desired place to be, in those moments.
Sprinkle a little more pep into every interaction you have. Put an extra bounce to your step And a little more animation to the gestures you have when you speak. Since women frequently adjust their feelings and perspectives to be on the same plane of the people they are with, you will find yourself readily surrounded by happy energetic people. These women will associate their emotional high to you and want to be spending more and more time with you, on a more regular basis. You can have more time available for those that are returns of your happy energies.
Kino Escalation
I was trying to find other ways of escalating and I figured something out which really worked out great.
When you are sitting down next to the girl take her hand and hold it between the two of you. Comment about her ring(s) or nails and instead of giving her back her hand, gently place it on your leg. (but don’t stop talking, keep conversation flowing or else you’ll look quite odd)
***It is said that don’t let the girl determine how long you touch her for (ex: arm around shoulder) and that you should be the one to time them***
However, for this method, I would say, let her decide what to do with her hand from there. Look for IOI’s.
1. If she gently takes her hand away while brushing your leg
2. If she leaves her hand there
3. If she moves up your thigh
4. If she squeezing your leg or thumb tap. Etc.
IF she were to quickly pull away, false disqualifiers would be sufficient or light negs. When this happens and you do these, move back as quick as her hand. This is key, because this will look like she is the one who is making the move on you.
“Whoa! You are a feisty one!”
“Hey now, I don’t want your cooties!”
“Hey, hey, hey! Just because we’re clicking doesn’t mean we’re going to fuck later!”
Then continue flow of conversation, go back to what you were talking about, or change subjects then start to build more on comfort. Then try again.
You can actually do this standing up as well. I was talking to Dean about this and he added some nice key points here as well.
Again, take her hand and comment on her ring or nails. Take her hand and place it on your shoulder as you joke around about anything. If she pulls back, again, false disqualifiers and light negs to have the two of you laugh together. Then start to build more on the comfort.
If she complies once you put her hand on your shoulder, place your hand on her lower back and gently pull in. Take her other hand and place it on your other shoulders, then you can begin to talk softly as you gaze deep into her eyes as you go in for the almost kiss or full make out.
You can even use this as a close for the night as well. Place her hand on your shoulder, your hand on her lower back, pull in and give her a cheek kiss goodbye. (The thing is this: Cheek kisses, the lips never touch the cheek. It’s usually cheek to cheek with an air kiss.) If her lips touch your cheek, she is most likely willing to go all the way with the make out. If not, hopefully you have her number already to work on later.
This is all about leading and escalating in kino. Leading shows dominance and the kino escalation creates a sexual vibe. You got to keep talking while you do this so that she won’t know what hit her till it is too late.
Try this out. It’s a lot of fun.
DSmoothMike – Dating Coach Assistant
D as in “Damn” Smooth as in “Butter” Mike as in “The Filippino lover!”
Las Vegas is the world’s adult Disney World. So image being there with a Dating coach guiding you along…scratch that, Image being there with 3-4 coaches!
There is a mansion in Vegas that is creating a buzz in this Seduction “Community”. Yes I said Mansion, 5 bedrooms and baths, fireplaces…yes more than one, POOL! and more!
“Hey hunny, great talking to you, you should come to the after party, AT OUR HOUSE, with a POOL, and Jacuzzi!!” ~C.J. “The Siege” to girls at team pull with JerseyBoy in LA.
Read that quote over again.
Now remeber it. Once you are rolling along in conversation with some new girls, drop that into conversation to see some girl’s eyes light up!
The from there all you have to do is work out logistics to move you all back to the Place wwhen sexy fun is abbout to ahppen.
You see, Siege is there with a single fun outcome in mind that will prioritize the others throughout what is going on. Sure He’ll be enjoying the rest ov=f Vegas, with a particular radar on.
And ALSO rememer, what he is looking to have he gets so once one girl in the group is making out, that feeling transfers to the girl you are talking to with him as your wing.
Then she want’s to making out, this increasing your ability to escalate with her ENPORMOUSLY!!
Then once back to the pad, the girl you are talking to hears/sees sexy time going on with C.J. and his girl. She too want to be having sexy-time since the mere thought of hearing her friend enjoying the pleasures she wants, willl raise her buying temperature like you’d never believe…that is unless you have singed up foro the Vegas Event
This is not your everyday meet-up or weekend boot camp, you and the coaches DO NOT part ways for hours after the outing to your respective hotel rooms. You get a text from a girl after the night is done, there is a coach right there ready to help!
This is a project house weekend in the city that parties 24/7! on Halloween weekend no less!
This isn’t just locals, this is everyone from every where, flying/driving in to party and be naughty!
Guys this is a chance to get out and broaden your horizons! Travel and bring home stories to your friends and even women in your home town. SO when she asks have you traveled your response can be something other than “Yes with my mom and dad, to Disney world, when i was FIVE!
The problem in this are of self-improvement is that there is too many who want to read material for days or months on end and never strp out of their home or their OR their comfort zone then go out with others who do that same thing, and it ends up being “The Blind leading the Blind”
Lets put a stop to that and hit Vegas with coaches and make some memories to last a life time!
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Vegas recommendations
There is some people on this forum heading to Vegas, so I thought I’d put in my recommendations and what I’ve learned:
1. Girls at tables won’t talk to you that much.
Well, if it’s tables like Craps or Roulette, they got time to talk after their turn, or during their turn, but when it comes down to card games, they would prefer not to talk, but think up ways on how to win. You can make quick and witty comments to grab her attention then pull her to a different table, but conversation wise, no- they will not talk to you.
2. Girls are easier at the slot machines.
Slot machines are designed so you can take your time with them. There is no pressure or rush to do anything. So they can stop whatever they are doing and talk to you, or play and talk at the same time.
3. Pull them from different parts of the casino.
The casinos have a lot of things to look at, and places to be. Such as bars, clubs, slot machines, tables, or even watching a game together. Pull them to different areas to create small intimate moments that you can expand on later.
4. Pull them to different casinos.
It’s like making small intimate moments inside the casino, you are now making a larger memory to help raise the attraction and comfort. Also, there is open liquor laws in Vegas. Share a drink outside by bridge that connects the Excaliber to the NYC Hotel, or watch the pirate show at the Treasure Island hotel for free.
5. Shopping Malls inside the casino and the Vegas Strip are awesome places to meet women too.
It’s like Day GSF, except you can pull them into the bedroom without leaving your hotel/casino (well, depending on where you are. I recommend Ceasars Palace. A lot of high class and beautiful girls there.)
6. Wednesday night (or was it Thursday?) at the Planet Hollywood Hotel/casino
Strippers on poles and half naked women everywhere. What’s not to enjoy?
7. Vegas has the best strip clubs in America
JUST DO IT
8. The Vegas Effect
Remember, no one REALLY lives in Vegas…and tourists are always more prone for one night stands as opposed to local natives. Why? Because it’s exciting, daring, and fun.
9. Don’t forget the 4 questions to SNL
This actually works a lot better there, I found.
10. Eat your vegetables…
Nothing is more sexy than a man who loves his vegetables.
AND HERE IS YOUR BONUS:
11. If you’re looking for drugs, late night, on the bridge the connects the NYC Hotel and the Excaliber. Dealers usually hang out there.
Overall, guys, have fun. If you’re looking for any other fun places to check out while you’re there, I visited about all the casino’s, so I know where to go.
-DSmoothMike, Assist. to Dating Coach
D as in “Damn” Smooth as in “Butter” Mike as in “The Filippino lover!”
When your arrogance is combined with humor, to be very funny it shows you are having a good time. You have no need to earn any woman’s attention or acceptance or approval. This has to be the fact of all matters with her. You are a [private]strong provider that can stride confidently through the battlefields of life with or without her. However, if she earns your affections then she can come along for the fun you have in store. (Click title for whole article)
If your comments are funny and make people laugh they are very welcome. They are enjoyable even when you are giving a person a hard time about something or teasing them. The tension of uncertainty excites people in such a way that allowed the teasing you may have in store for them.
This strong providing man striving through the battlefields of life needs to be tested by a woman to know how strong their strength is. No matter what a woman presents you with true maintain your composure through all thick and thin will display a valuable guide to her. Getting angry and or upset over meaningless issues reveals insecurity and a person and is unpleasant to be around nonetheless.
Please do yourself a favor and welcome all of her tests. They are indicating that she is interested in you and would like to know more about you. Be charmed by this, and welcome it just make sure you maintain all of your composure throughout all of this. After some time, you will be able to see through them, see what they are and understand where she’s coming from. Remember that you never need to embrace or accept negative energies coming towards you and you can walk away at any time. You are a non-clingy person. “I do not need and negative energy in my world and I can walk away any time it feels less than desirable.”
(www.getherchasingyou.com) Maintaining her chasing through texting
For a good example of how well girls respond to playful anything and how the like a masculine dominance express so they feel better about their feminine humility/submissiveness to come forth, there was a recent message banter I thought I could share.
She has actively contacted me every so often. We have hung out but a few times more recently she had to cancel tentative plans because of complications in her life. So a few days ago I get this message:
HBNurse: Hey sweetie whats up with ya ya ya? Do u miss me or do u hate me now? Xo
(I am guessing she is referring to her last need to cancel our tentative plans.)
Me: You are in a neutral limbo status with potential available to you that could put you on the good side in a moment’s notice…that is if you take the right steps.
(Subtextually, I am letting her know that I haven’t totally written her off, but if she wants ot be in good favor with me, there are steps she will need to take. This is another level of that sweet spot to indicate to girls. They do not have total..[/private] …approval yet they are not rejected/dismissed. There is a clear enough indication that her actions in the right way can lead to the rewards she wants. Not too easily obtained, but the potential is within her reach.)
HBNurse: K. I would like right steps obi wan. School ur young jedi…..
(This is great. She is the one to turn it into a game, so to speak. She is following my lead to what I indicated, but giving us the fictional roles of characters in Star Wars. I hear which way she is following my lead and I go with that as well, rewarding her choices that are in the direction I want along the way. Like in child psychology, reward the good behavior you want more of & ignore the negative behaviors to make them go away. Girls work the same way. Good result or bad result they are driven to do those things that get the most attention. )
Me: Ok, Miss Young Skywalker…first step is for you to alert me when you are in my area and have a block of time to do what you want with.
(Here, I am rewarding her following my lead and I will play along with the roles she found. The roles actually will let me be more direct as the game goes along since it is joking, with the real meaning heard underneath. She hits me up every so often with texting banter, but here I am telling her to let me know when she wants to get together & is ready to take more of my direction. I already won’t make plans with her unless I am absolutely certain she will follow through, so when she does what I asked, this is the first step in her making a commitment she will follow through with. )
HBNurse: Yes master…. Then?
(I know she wants to text banter on a sexual level at this point. I will do nothing but vague hints to let her imagination do most of the work. Just like there are ways to build tension and create open loops in texts, tension can be released for her in texts. I see her curiosity and decide to keep it at that at this point. With this game on the table now, later I can simply recall that curiosity in her at a later point with it.)
Me: You will be given the next directions when you have successfully completed the first step…and second step isn’t guaranteed unless it is clear you are ready for more…who knows, you may get second step first time you complete the first one or maybe you won’t get it until the tenth time you have completed the first step…it all depends on the moment & your readyness for more in that moment.
(Here I am telling her that her curiosity will not be satisfied until she completes the first direction I gave her. I won’t even tell her the next steps. Some girls can get release of that tension through sexy talk through even texts. Every girl is different but I like to continuously be building tension, holding off from that release until it can be done physically.)
HBNurse: Yes master… I understand! What will u have me do…
(She heard what I said, but is trying again to get me to give her some sexier talk within the texts. I will vaguely hint at more when I see that my building of more tension will have her wanting that release AND is able/ready to meetup for that release to happen physically. Not only do I repeat what she needs to do to get what she wants… )
Me: Good girl, but listen: <> …it may be different depending on the moment you complete that….depending on the current moment & how ready for more you express you are.
(…I get a little more specific so she knows what factors will increase the likelihood of her getting what she wants.)
HBNurse: Yes master soon ill b ready to complete my training….
(Here she is telling me she heard what I said & is clear. Previously I told her to withhold contacting me until she had a block of time with no constraint but it still is no guarantee.)
Me: Ok, Leave me be until you feel you are ready.
(I know I can call back the theme of this banter at any time later to remind her or re-spark her curiosity…but for now, I will take away this banter until she tells me she has time, or I pick it up to re-spark those things.)
What girls want least is those things they can have too easily. They want those things more that are hard to get. What they want most are those things that are just a hairsbreadth out of their reach, what they can almost have if they figure out the best steps to take. Giving them indication of what those steps might be is a good feeler to see their readiness. As soon as they start to try (getting the chasing going) they will get small rewards with indications of how they can modify their steps to get bigger rewards.
I stay vague about the exact reward possible, just vague hints but am clearer about the steps they need to take…[/private] …to even find out what those rewards might be. I let their imagination do most of the work. It comes up with things closer to what they want, and their never quite sure if they are right anyways.
That uncertainty creates desire in them just to find out what those rewards might be and to know a clearer picture of what they need to do to get them…. is a larger factor in creating desire than anything explicit described anyways.
[private]I had been teaching this level for some time. I don’t specify exactly how long too much because it reminds me how ancient I may be. Regardless, I have loved to have been there when guys make amazing breakthroughs within themselves and with women they are attracted to.
One of the parts I have been doing for myself the whole time but only semi-recently figured out how to teach was the generating momentum, and maintaining the momentum of a girl to be pursuit of a guy. I have done it for so long for a few reasons. A part of me is lazy to a point and very much likes when the girl is the one putting in the work to pursue me.
This can work against me sometimes. Since all girls are different inside, how they think, what they expect, what they respond to is a very wide scope. Most girls have responded very well to the things I do, yet you still see a range to how much each one will and what exactly they will do to be chasing.[/private]
First off, I want to say…THE FUCKING STRIPPERS HERE ARE FUCKING AMAZING!!! I just went to (and it was voted) the BEST strip club in AMERICA!!! It was called, “Spearmint Rhino”. If you ever, and I mean, EVER go to Vegas, fucking go there. They grind the shit out of your dick as you smack that fine ass. Now, my story:
Before I came in, I gave my [private]cousin and my friend $100 bucks each to spend on me while I game it at the club. Seige taught me that for the club, you do [private] not tip the girl you like. The reason behind it is that you don’t want to be in “working mode” because you’d be nothing more than a mere client trying to taste the forbidden fruit. I taught my friend and cousin a little bit about the stripper game, so they can have a better understanding of what I am doing. I figure, if you go out with you non-lair friends, inform them a little about what you’re going to do, so they won’t fuck it up for you accidentally.
Inside the club, we sat by a corner and this blond Bulgarian stripper approaches me. She sits by my side and get’s close. She explains the Vegas rules of the strip club which is soo much lenient than Boston will ever be. This stripper and I were talking about thrill rides and how it can relate to sex. My friend then decides to let me have the Vegas treatment and bought me 30 minutes in the VIP room. In the VIP room, we got really intimate. One of the rules of the club was that there was no kissing on the lips. I looked at her deep into her eyes and said, “I bet you want to kiss me right now…” She then replies, “I can’t…my boss might be looking.” I look at her in the eyes as she was dancing and said, “Listen, place your hair around my head and it will act like a shield. No one can see you do it.” So she did and we made out some. Then she sits on my lap and says to me, “You are hypnotizing me?” I smiled, “Why? Is it working?”
gmorrocco has been telling me to slow down my patter down a ton, so it can sound more seductive. I really slowed it down for her and been prolonging each syllable, and now I am beginning to see results.
Every time that her boss would walk past, she would start to make out with me again. It truly was grand. She then says, “How long are you staying here?” I replied, “I’m only here till Saturday. Listen, I got my own suite at the new casino, Aria. I do not know what Vegas is REALLY like, maybe you can help show me.” She then said that she would love to. Then I asked her, “If only there was a way I can keep in touch with you.” Then she told me that she would give me her number after the VIP room, because she isn’t allowed to give it out. Then we began talking about psychedelic drugs. We made out again and she began to grind the shit out of my dick. After she was done, she gave me her number and went back into work mode.
Another stripper came by and we began talking. My cousin offered to buy me a dance. I said, “I’m not sure how this chick is. She may be Brazilian, but can she dance?” The Brazilian stripper slaps me on the arm and says, “Trust me, baby, I am one of the best”, I replied, “Then show me what you got, and I’ll make the judgement.” This girl here was extremely good! She really put her heart and soul dancing for me. After the song was done, she asked me if I wanted another. I looked at my cousin and he offered another one. But I said, “This dance was ok-good, but do you REALLY think that she can do better?” She then says, “Fine, I’ll give you good” And for some reason or another, the 2nd time around was fucking spectacular! If you ever seen the movie called, “Showgirls”, she was dancing like that main character in the pool scene. It was fabulous!
Then a former playboy model comes up and starts to talk to us. She had wonderful tits, but ugly lips. It looked like she fell on a hot iron. She gave us a lap dance and just chilled with us the entire night there. My cousin was very smooth keeping her there the entire time. I was observing and all he basically did was look into her eyes, listen, and then repeat back what she was saying. I began doing that with other strippers that came my way. It was working like a charm.
The last stripper my friend got me had was dressed in a school girl outfit. It was pretty hot. I told her that if she wanted to earn that A, she had to do something for me. Cue funky music. This girl really dry humped the shit out of me. She really rode my dick to the heavens and back down again. I began to neg her about how she is not earning that A, which made her work even harder. She put her bra over my head and spent most of the dance on my dick and rubbing her titties all over my face as I roughly motorboated the shit out of them twins! This was by far the best dance I’ve ever had. After the dance, she asked me how I did. I said, “A solid…C” So she dried humped me, then asked me again. I then said, “B-. If you want to earn that A, you really got to try even harder!” So she dry humped me until I creamed. She smiles at me and says, “There you go, professor” and parted ways. After that night, my balls were hurting with all those strippers grinding on my dick.
Then we hit up the Bellagio and won some money.
This is my last day here in Vegas, so I am to go out and make the best of it.
Then closing ratio skyrockets when you get their [private] eyes locked on you before you even approach in the first place.
Girls are attracted and drawn to the alpha look with strong body language.
They can see high self confidence, high self esteem and social status.
They can easily see the leader of a group who is a challenge. This challenge creates intrigue. Be an experienced playa, intelligent and passionate with a lack of insecurity.
You can go through all of your ways, never seeking approval. That can be detected when you have high standards and credibility. [/private]
you can be saying “I am confident, I am in control and I am the selector.”
You can just be the one to[private] turn away first, walk away to give her some space and let what she has received as your vibe to sink in.
Squint a little bit.
If you see her pull back, you can pull back further. If you see any of her body language indicating that she is ready to walk away, pivot your body and point one of your feet away as if you are about to walk away. Many times, you will see this draw her in closer to keep you around. The subtle signals that come through body language are huge signals that reveal a strong inner belief and strong self confidence.
You can indicate subtle gestures that express power and dominance. You can offhandedly touch the small of her back and this makes her feel protected by you in a subtle way. Cupping her face does this and stroking her hair and head will do the same. [/private]
So I know we just met last night, [private]but don’t get too excited. I need to get to KNOW you first. Geez! But if we get along, then I’ll let you can take me out for dinner and buy me roses and chocolates. ;p
It is so cool to know you are a counselor. In my prior position as an ESL teach I loved helping people learn what they wanted. So, I deeply admire how passionate you are about helping people on such an intimate level. I’m sure it gets stressful. So, I do have some good news. I know the most fun and awesome way for you to relieve stress! [/private]
…to be disqualifying yourself from being a possible suitor of hers.
You can use all sorts of ways to indicate this. One very explicit way I may say[private] after she does something I can tease her about.
I will look off to the side as if I am talking to an imaginary person and say loud enough so she hears it: “Ok C.J., note to self: don’t date this girl, she is….”[/private]
So she has heard my mocking reasons to be wary of her.
First, since you have previously made a good connection for you to disconnect from, this gives her the space, the need to pursue you. When you disconnect properly, [private]you become a commodity that she wants to have more of. When you are the one man who is not groveling for her attentions, you already are standing out from the rest.
This is not harshly pushing her away forever. You are just creating a distance between the 2 of you that looks to her as a distance she can bridge. This sort of distance causes you to become interesting to her.
If you give her a truth disconnect or even bust her on bad behavior she is likely to explain herself or even apologize. Stay observant to the truths around you and those truths about her. Doing this without much opinion added to it is something people realistically look at and adjust their behaviors for a more favorable truth to be revealed about themselves.
If you want to have chemistry with a woman, you both have room to move in; room to move towards each other. If you don’t give her room to move towards you, you won’t have chemistry and that will have you rarely getting success. If you go and fulfill all of a woman’s desires, she has nowhere to go but away.
I see many guys who aren’t giving the girl room to move towards them. If you are always moving towards her she has no room to move towards you. Disconnection gives her room, and a desire for you that is unfulfilled and draws her in your direction. These show difference between you and her and cause her to work for your approval.
Disconnection shows you are a strong, bold interesting man. Disconnection creates controversy which is interesting on every level. Controversy is inherently interesting.
[/private]
“Listen< i am for the thoery to ‘Make awkward sexual advances not war’ so if you play your cards right…” andd then I change the subject letting her curiosity grow.
[private]“Isn’t that pathetic? “ & she asks what do you mean. “When a guy does things like that, you can tell he is probably a nice guy with good intentions. He’d enjoy nothing in the world more than to be with you. But then he goes and gums the whole thing up by kissing your ass like that. What a shame. He doesn’t get it. He has no idea what’s attractive to a woman.”[/private]
“You’re[private] pretty cool. You can help me pick up chicks.”[/private]
This takes the possibility out of her head that I was hitting on her while still putting us on the same team mentality.
Another way to begin the momentum of her curiosity is to pick something about her. Then say [private] “You know what they say about women who….****.” (Whatever I can see about her). But I don’t tell her, I just look at her in a knowing way.[/private]
[private]“Hey knucklehead, show’s over here, thank you very much.” There is great value in creating and maintaining curiosity in the girl about you. This is part of starting, building and maintaining the momentum of her chasing you, in pursuit of you. Fact of the matter is, is that both the girl and the guy are truly happier this way. A girl has been pursued her whole life, since she hit puberty. Guys have been pursuing women since puberty too. She actually feels refreshed when she is pursuing the attentions of a man, and vice-versa. A point recently brought up that is an excellent factor in this is maintaining her curiosity about you. An example is the ‘open loop’ factor. By opening a curious thread, then marking it and saving it for later will leave her curious to know more from you. Here, like this: Let say we are talking about a random topic. I may interject the topic with a statement like this. “By the way, I’ve noticed something about you. I’ll tell you about that in one moment, but before I do…” Then I continue what we were talking about before I interjected that point. Now here curiosity is left open, like an open loop. On some of these she may not need to know th rest where you can bring it up later, but best bet, since it is about her, she will have this question ringing in her head quite a bit. She may let the current topic finish out, but often, since it is about her, she will try to cut things off and get you to tell her the rest. Now you have a sweet spot. You can continue to tease her, holding off the answer, treating her like your little sister that wants that last candy bar you got. You can continue to redirect back to the original topic, trying to keep her actively engaged & participating, even though the open loop will be ringing in her head. Based on her persistence, I may praise her “I like a girl who knows what she wants and actively pursues it until she gets it.” There is some subtext, some underlying meaning to making that statement to her. As she gets frustrated you can hug across her shoulders as if you are jokingly consoling her frustration. “Patience, sweetheart, best things come to those who are patient.” If you can alternate your reasons and format of putting her off, you can gauge when a good time to close the loop would be, to tell her the rest of the idea. As with other kinds of beneficial teasing, as long as you can hold her off, it will be a playful spot holding her want of some thing from you. This also is subtly showing her that you are a teasing like person and will keep her wanting more in other, more intimate situations.[/private]
Not having a guy orgasm (yet) during a sexual encounter does leave a heavy open loop in a girl. All the girl talk I grew up with hearing & still hear from chick-friends, tells me a huge satisfaction to a girls sexual experience is when the guy orgasms. They feel a major part is missing. Girls grow up yearning to please people, especially the guy they are with.
By continuously holding off my own orgasm, I usually use this loop in a single night to keep her coming back to me wanting more over and over again – allowing me to bring her to higher and higher orgasms with each attempt she has to try & make me come.
This creates a reward pattern of her coming to me sexually, wanting me regularly. Also with having the opportunity to bring her to major heights in climax that she may have never had before or definitely isn’t used to, that will stay on her mind and have her back for more repeatedly.
Learning through practice (yes it does take practice to not give in, but it is SO worth it), the discipline to hold yourself off from orgasm can be incredibly valuable.
A huge part of being able to make that happen, like other sexual magic, all starts in a girls mind & emotions before anything else….and carrying everything else along its way.
One thing I found that works with any girl to increase the volume of their magical moment, and also maintains the momentum of getting her to be chasing you, even sexually, starts with that discipline I just mentioned.
I like to tease a girl until she is begging to have me inside of her. Like many parts of her in pursuit of the guy, it is both satisfying for the girl & the guy. I love to hear a girl begging for my cock to be inside of her and to hear her begging for more all along the way.
Previously, I have written posts about a slow teasing pattern that works in oral sex on a girl, so this one is about intercourse teasing.
To lay out the groundwork, I can start explaining from the point when you both are naked. Let’s say she is naked and lying on her back, she is ready to take you inside of her. You are naked and perched above her.
Use this moment to your advantage, do not put your cock in yet. Take the tip of it and rub all around her vaginal lips, down one side then up the other. Tracing circles and patterns around her clitoris with the tip makes her feel all sorts of different feelings.
Maybe you go to making out a little bit along with this, then brush across those vaginal lips from side to side with just the tip of your cock.
I do this, I ask: “Does that feel good?” She always says ‘yes’
At this point I still will not enter her at all; I am now playing all around her vagina just with the tip of my cock. This is getting her very aroused, wet and super turned on with desire for more. From everything she knows about sex from past experiences, this is the time that she knows she would normally have a cock inside of her already, but it hasn’t happened yet. She wants it more because of this.
As I said, most of the magic a girl will feel starts in her mind and her emotions, so I playfully talk to her this whole time. I tell her that she feels good to me, that she is so wet, that she feels hot (the touching my tip can feel); I feel the heat of her pussy.
Since I know what main thought is on her mind, I capture that and tell her “I want to feel inside you so bad.” She will be thinking: (Me too, Now do it already!!)
Sometimes a girl will say right away “Then put it in!” or “Me too.”, something on that same idea. I still do not penetrate her yet. Even though she just said that to me, I will still ask her “Do you want me to?”
She’ll say yes & I say “Then say ‘please’.” This whole time I am still tickling her pussy with the tip of my cock. Sometimes she will try to get it easy and just say “Please” but that still isn’t enough.
“No Hun, tell me to put my cock in you please” as I am still tickling and teasing her with the tip of my cock. Up and down both sides of her vaginal lips, across them back and forth and the tip even between her lips, feeling her wetness but not inserted at all. I keep doing this while kissing her neck sometimes until she says what I asked her to say.
Once she says what I asked her to say: “C.J. Please put your cock in me.” I will put about ½ of an inch in. This 1/2 inch is going in and out, sometimes rubbing up and down her lips but only this ½ inch, rubbing her wetness all over the sides of her lips too.
“Ok, but just a little bit.” I tell her. (“A game called ‘just the tip, just for a second, just to see how it feels.” ~WC) She will feel this wetness on more area of her vagina; the coolness of the air where she is wet will let her feel her wetness more, turning her on even more. I will do this for a little while since the longer you can do this the more desire for a cock to be in her will totally increase.
Every minute you are teasing is cranking up her desire enormously.
After a few minutes of this I will ask her “Does that feel good?” Which she will tell me: “Yes.” I confirm her ‘yes’ by telling her “So good” which she very much likes to hear. Then I will ask her “Do you want me to be inside of you more…deeper?”
If she just says: “Yes” I will tell her again: “Then ask me.”
If she just asks without the please, once again I will tell her to say the whole sentence, adding ‘please’ to it. She usually will be letting herself ask in moans of pleasure: “Go deeper, please.”
Once she complies with my request to ask a certain way, I will comply with her request to go a little deeper. Still this time I will enter her more but only a whole inch of my cock will enter her. The in and out motion, but of only the first inch of the cock, that’s it. I will put in an inch for a bit, take it completely out so it rubs her front lips a lot, this is affecting her clitoris, then back in her.
“That’s all for now.” I will go back to rubbing up and down the lips, only putting my cock an inch in, then taking it back out.
Rubbing up and down her lips and across, side to side, is making vibrations that will be tickling her clitoris while indicating the possibility of the whole cock in her which she wants so much more at this point. The longer this is done, the more this will increase her desire, AND increasing her climax when she finally gets it.
With this being said to her, and the holding back, spoken and physical teasing is what engages her mind and emotions to be on the same wavelength as her body, increasing what her body feels. Every time you pull completely out, and hold outside of her for a moment or two, she is feeling the sensations she just felt with a cock in her as pleasure but now those feelings are fading.
She likes those feelings & she wants more. Not only is this significantly turning the volume way up on her desire, it is revealing a man with great discipline which she will be very attractive to her. She has had plenty of experience with men who want her and want sex with her and want to be fully inserted and pounding away. Many guys want to jackhammer her, spoo on her belly and pass out.
From her experience with men who want to get her to bed and get right down to business right away, by doing this has you sticking out in her mind already. Then when the sexy-time is over, even days later she will be daydreaming, recalling the encounter, wanting more. I have had girls tell me this idea in different ways on numerous occasions. (I still have ex’s message me sexy thoughts and tell me of ‘last nights dream’ every so often)
So for each step, I ask her if she wants more, I get her in the habit of asking me with ‘please’. As her desire grows she will start asking the whole request on her own just because I showed her what she needs to do to get more but I still hold off for a while with only 1 & ½ inches in her. She just learned what will get her more of what she wants right now; her desire is up so high she will start emphatically begging.
Each time you can hold off. As she is asking for more on her own, you can hold off longer & she will ask over and over, it will get her sexually begging. This is a place both the guy and the girl are happier and getting more fulfillment. She is getting positive results from her actions you directed her to which is a reward. It showed her that her behavior is rewarding her. By seeing that: when she does what you want, she gets what she wants, she remembers this.
As you slowly progress going deeper in ½ inch increments, you will see her moving her body in ways to get you deeper. She may even wrap her lags around your hips to pull you in. The more you can hold off, even resisting these moves with your strength; she will try harder and try different ways, till the sex becomes a play wrestling game.
I will continuously remind her: “Not yet honey” if she tries to pull me in without asking. She is asking in a voice of desperation, wanting cock in her, and making moves to get more. This is a fantastic momentum to be in and maintained as long as you can. The longer you can hold each step to be, before advancing to the next one will be building up her desire like steam under pressure.
The longer you hold off, the larger her orgasm will be too. By small increments of more, continued in that way for as long as possible builds this pressure up. Each step is a mere 1/2 more held at that level as log as possible… slowly giving her what she is wanting. Her desire increases with each step.
Once you do get to that place where you are all the way inside of her, pelvis to pelvis, I would not just start the in-and-out, jackhammer routine. By staying inside her all the way, if you can tilt your pelvis in a rocking motion over hers (tilting forward & back), you will be stimulating her clitoris with a whole cock inside of her. Also when your pelvis pivots down, it aims your cock up to her G-spot, very nice. This doesn’t normally happen from regular sex.
If every guy she has ever been with has given her only the jackhammer routine (which most do, so I hear), sure it feels good for her to a point, but not as much as with feelings like this. This is 3 different forms of stimulation at the same time for her. As women can have 9 different types of orgasms to our 2, by combining a few of their types will make a larger orgasm (clitoral, depth & g-spot sensations simultaneously).
To keep variety of sensations for her, even in the rocking, I will take my cock completely out of her. I then will pause for a moment or two while I am kissing her to let the feelings she just had in her pussy sink in and her desire to rise again. Sometimes coming completely out of her, then back in. This will alternate the feelings of cock deep inside of her with touching cock to the lips that will jiggle her clitoris a bit (I have heard grapevine talk from friends of girls I hooked up with that mentioned this ‘completely out’ part has magic on its own), then do a pivot to stimulate her G-spot.
Alternating these sensations for her will give her an orgasm on a wider, larger level. When the cock is out and playing with her lips I will use it like a finger, making circles around her clitoris.
Then other times I take the cock completely out of her to pause, then I just play with her lips with the tip of my cock as I did before. Again this is going to be tickling her clitoris, and teasing her to want your cock inside of her even more since she just had those feelings and wants them again.
Although other things can be done with a girlfriend that is more comfortable on the trust level and all of that, I have found this to bring a girl to orgasm almost every time, even with a first night encounter (SNL) with a girl.
There has been more than one girl who has told me that she only can come when she gets oral or girls that have said they only come when they are on top. In both of these types of situations, I have brought them to orgasm in a way they didn’t know was possible for them – missionary position with me on top. Although it may not be my favorite position for sex, I do know there is something very fulfilling for her in another sense, in addition to stimulation, from face to face intercourse with her on the bottom.
[/private]
The reason I hardly use anything of a direct compliment of beauty is because of the truth of the matter. It takes way more than beauty for me to want a girl more than one night. That’s just me personally.
Sure a woman’s good looks can [private]catch my attention, but it takes much more than that for her to be able to hold it. I have dated plenty of models, strippers and perfect 10s but if she is boring, psycho or another version of the crazy cat lady, I have better ways to spend my time.
I always want to see what she is like first. I may subtly indicate something about her has caught my attention, but clearly letting her know I want to know much more before my final decisions are made..
Not only does this qualify the type of high quality woman I want in my life, a woman values what she has caught with the essence of her personality much more than what her good looks (thank her parents) will get her. “Hey, you seemed to have a good energy about ya, I wanted to say ‘Hi’ to see what you’re like.”
It is another part of generating her to be chasing you from the first moment. A woman isn’t about to chase a guy she thinks she has won over because she had been blessed with some genetic perfection. She is going to work at getting and having the man that her conscious actions and behaviors have earned her. By this, she knows that she can continue her good behavior to keep him around even when she is sick in bed and can’t pretty-up for the day.
That’s just from my experience & preference. Guys get their successes in all sorts of ways…”Hey, with 3.4 billion women on Earth, there is no absolute method, just formulas for best results.”
(Yes, sometimes I do use the “I thought you’re cute & wanted to say hi” but I don’t do more than that since ‘cute’ can relate to more than her looks…and “Beauty without personality is like a masterpiece painted on a napkin” The reason I say ‘thought’ is that it was my first impression and now by talking I am checking if she lives up to my guess, but that’s just me.)[/private]
to show and express his sexuality, his masculinity in its true form.
By building up her excitement and passion with you while keeping your obtained-ability to be slightly out of her reach…for her to not know for sure, this is key. Keeping you slightly out of her reach to fully capture, keeps her attraction switches to be fully on.
[private]
People always want more what they cannot have, but what they want most is what they almost can have, but not quite yet. When it is just barely out of their reach, they see what reward they will get if they work just a little bit harder. While she is thinking she can almost have you, this keeps her in full pursuit.
If you are too easy to get, she is going to lose interest and chase a different prize. If you are too hard to catch, her efforts are going to show her no results so then she would chase somebody who she thinks she can catch.
By keeping her in that ‘almost’ state keeps her chasing and each time you give her a tiny bit more of you, she feels a big reward from that. Like dangling a piece of string for a cat, almost within reach so it plays. Every so often it catches a piece of the string with a claw but it is pulled away so it wants it more, it beefs up its strategy. It keeps playing, it keeps chasing.
[/private]
Heather announces “This is Jodie, she’s my princess….the coolest!”
Telling Jodie my name, I go on to [private] introduce myself, the group-hug them both. Then I ask Jodie what she likes best about Heather is? She tells me Heather looks out for her friends before looking out for herself, that she can make a party out of a board meeting, and that she is the sweetest girl ever.
“That’s sounds about right.” I tell them. “I like a party girl who takes care of who she loves.” and I give them both a high-five. In that simple move I have found out what I like to be in a girl to be in my life.
I showed how much I do like that and kept the playful affection to be easy going [/private]
When she sees that [private] a guy’s life is exciting, she works to feel special to him or that she has earned his attention. Women value what they work for much more than what their looks have made available to them. If she has taken steps to gain her rewards, then she is rewarded for what she does, not her luck in the gene pool.[/private]
…so I throw in a push/pull for a couple of reason.
I tell her: “I don’t think we should get to know each other.”
She asks me:[private] “Why not?”
I explain: “I think you are just too much of a nice girl for me.”
The first “Why not?” from her is what begins the momentum. She already is thinking or will be thinking of what obstacles she needs to overcome to prove herself as worthy.
Once I tell her that she is too much of a ‘nice girl’ she now knows what she has to prove her way out of. I have seen girls tell their stories of mischief, explain her duality from looking like a nice girl to her other side, and also doing a wild mischief right in front of me.
By first telling her that we shouldn’t get to know each other, removes her first assumption that I might have been hitting on her. This also flips the coin so she knows she has things to show me that would earn her my time, that I am not another guy who is going to sit there and try to impress her, trying to seem valuable enough for her to spend time with me.
Girls would rather be chasing a guy. Their little behaviors that earn them small rewards is a hell of a lot more fulfilling to them then thinking they can have a guy simply because they were born with a good part of the gene pool.
People want least what they can absolutely have no matter what. They want more of what they feel they cannot have…AND the want most what they almost can have but is always a tiny bit out of their reach. They can never have a firm grip or a sure hold, this keeps them chasing.
I may say when I hear a point about a new girl that I like.
This does a few things. I am[private] calling her dude, which will false disqualify me from her thinking I am hitting on her in any way.
Calling a girl ‘dude’ indicates I see her as a chick-buddy and nothing else.
Next in the phrase, I am referring to our ‘friendship’. I hear guys all the times talking about ways to stay out of her ‘Friend-zone’.
What I have found through years of experience is that I am frequently indicating that she may stay in my ‘friend-zone’ if she doesn’t play her cards right. Once a girl feels she might get slooted this way, she increases what she can to avoid it.
This is another way to generate her to be chasing you, or chasing to have more with you very early on.
I also haven’t told her she definitely has a place to be my friend, it is not definite yet. I say “This friendship MAY work…”
Yes there are things about her I like, but she has not won me over yet. As I have said before, to keep a girl in that sweet spot between total validation and lack there of is what will keep her working to be with you.
Girls like this better anyways. They know that there are steps they need to take, behaviors the need to have to be rewarded with a specific guy’s interest. She does not feel that just because she looks hott in a picture that her desires are automatically fulfilled, she has to work to get what she wants, and this feels much better in itself anyways. [/private]
guys have been chasing them in one way or another. Guys grow up thinking that they must buy a woman gifts, take her out to dinner and earn her approval. Girls have had it easy their whole life, so once they meet an interesting guy who is actually a challenge for them to have, their desire and attraction for him quickly escalates.
While creating sexual tension,[private] you are taking the role of the pursued person. You show her sparks of interest an attention but never completely. You still do not know if she is cool enough to add to your social circle even, not to mention getting intimate with her. While she never really knows for sure if you are into her or not (getting mixed messages from you) keeps her in the chasing mode to find out for sure. When she feels a sleight interest from you, she wants it to be certain. Many guys who express certain interest in a girl right away will lose her attention quickly; she will look around to find a more challenging guy.
Consistently giving her these mixed signals causes this tension to build in her to the point where she can only see a release of it is to get physical with you. Then she will have her uncertainty answered. The conflicting feelings in her that built this tension are the indication that you might be interested, you might be attracted to her, but she is not sure.
When you first meet a woman, you can have great results on creating and building this tension while you playfully watch her chase you in a variety of ways.
Body language is a powerful force in all of this. You can give her your undivided attention with your eye contact, keep your gestures to be welcoming to her and the suddenly let you attention be grabbed by something else. In the middle of a high point you can cut a sentence off halfway through, and go check on your friends or open a another girl who is nearby. While she is talking, you can triangulate your gaze on her, then quickly find something else to do.
You can give her most of your friendly/shining personality. Reward some of her jokes with your laughter. Reward some of her flirts with a flirt back and then take them away. Tease her like a little sister, but just enough playful so she wants more of this fun razzing, she wants more.
It can be very ‘in your favor’ to be doing things opposite of common courtesy, which would have her be able to say she doesn’t like you. Much of what I teach about in capturing her frame is that of understanding where a girl is usually coming from I a situation and act like it is you going through those same things with her (Example.) She sees that you have an understanding of how she thinks & what she goes through, yet playing the part of you to be the one going through those things.
A confident man has no fear or hesitation to show and express his sexuality in its truest form. By building up her excitement and passion with you while keeping your obtain-ability to be slightly out of her reach to capture, keeps her attraction switches to be fully on. People want more what they cannot have, yet the want MOST what they can almost have.
While she is thinking she can almost have you keeps her in full pursuit. If you are to easy to get, she will lose interest and chase a different prize. If you are too hard, and her efforts show her no results, then she will chase somebody she thinks she can catch. By keeping her in that almost state keeps her chasing, and each time you give her a tiny bit more of you, she feels a big reward from that. Like dangling a piece of string for a cat, it is almost within reach so it plays. Every so often it catches a piece of the yarn with a claw but then it is pulled away again so it keeps playing, keeps chasing.[/private]
…thank you very much.” I have said to a distracted girl more than once
There is great value in creating and maintaining curiosity in the girl about you. This is part of starting, building and maintaining the momentum of her chasing you, in pursuit of you. Fact of the matter is, [private] that both the girl and the guy are truly happier this way. A girl has been pursued her whole life, since she hit puberty. Guys have been pursuing women since puberty too.
until she has shown you that she is cool & you like her for reasons I have learned.
First dates should be easy-going time to get to know each other. I think paying for dinners & stuff indicates she has this privilege from you without earning it. She will think you are basically paying for time with her, so I usually go to free stuff. If I like what I have learned so far about her, it is something [private] small like coffee & I pay, I would just tell her: “I got this one, you get the next one.” To keep us on more of an even level, indicating a future date too.
A few ideas that are free are:
Museum of Science – Library pass
New England Aquarium – Library Pass
Museum of Fine Arts – Library pass
MFA Wednesdays from 4 – 9:45
Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum – Library pass at Copley Sq, Jamaica plain & West Roxbury
Castle Island – for walking around, getting to know each other
Blue Hills Picnic – in mild weather
Stargazing Fridays 8:30 PM at Museum of Science (Gilliland Observatory Hotline 617-589-0267)
On the museums with library passes, it shows a resourceful guy, & it doesn’t put the vibe of economy into the whole first date scenario. These are just a few ideas for you to mull over. Museums and walking around are a little different from the standard dating routine, taking the pressure off & it is more like you are a couple, exploring something together, like you already know each other in a sense.
[/private]
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